Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, "I'm an idiot."
Rule 9
Get the bartender's attention with eye contact and a smile.
Rule 79
If you are 86'd, do not return for at least three months. To come back sooner makes it appear no other bar wants you.
Rule 35
Learn to appreciate hangovers. If it was all good times every jackass would be doing it.
Rule 43
A bar is a college, not a nursery. If you spill a beer, clean it up. If you break a glass, wait for a staff member to clean it up, then blame it on someone else.
Rule 67
Never ask a bartender "What's good tonight?" They do not fly in the scotch fresh from the coast every morning.
Rule 13
If he makes it too weak, order a double next time. He'll get the message.
Rule 81
If you're going to drink on the job, drink vodka. It's the no-tell liquor.
Rule 38
If you're the bar's sole customer, you are obliged to make small talk with the bartender until he stops acknowledging you. Then you're off the hook. The same goes for him.
Rule 70
The patrons at your local bar are your extended family, your father, hers, your brothers and sisters. Except you get to sleep with these sisters. And if you're really drunk, the mothers.
Rule 76
The greatest thing a drunkard can do is buy a round of drinks for a packed bar.
Rule 8
When the bartender is slammed, resist the powerful urge to order a slightly-dirty, very-dry, in-and-out, super-chilled half-and-half martini with a lemon twist. Limit orders to beer, straight shots and two-part cocktails.
Rule 49
If you do a shot, finish it. If you don't plan to finish it, don't accept it.
Rule 52
Your songs will come on as you're leaving the bar.
Rule 80
Anyone with three or more drinks in his hands has the right of way.
On Tap
INNSider's Club
Who's Online
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VISITORS
Tel 847-843-8048 Fax 847-843-9126
Neighborhood Inn Bar & Grill 2322 Hassell Rd. Hoffman Estates, IL 60195
Open daily til 3am
All special pricing on alcoholic beverages is in effect for the entire day.
Valid Proof of Age required to purchase alcohol! We I.D. Everyone.